Author (Avtor): Michelle Warren
Genre (Kategorija): Contemporary Romance (sodobna romantika)
Release date (Datum izida): October 18, 2017 (18. oktober 2017)
BLURB (OPIS)
Five years ago an
unthinkable tragedy slashed Cait London’s life into two parts: before
she had amnesia and after. Determined to keep her past hidden and start
over, she moves to Chicago and plunges into a new job—all while keeping a
walled distance from everyone she meets.
It’s not long before Cait reconsiders her solitary existence, and soon she’s stepping beyond her boundaries and taking unthinkable chances, like crushing on her impossibly sexy landlord, Evan Wade. He’s flirty, annoying, and with him living in the same apartment building, she can’t stop thinking about him. If she can sleep with him once, perhaps she can get him out of her system. The problem is, Evan seems bulletproof to her advances. As the two develop a connection, it becomes clear Cait may not succeed before her heart remembers what it feels like to love.
Ten Thousand Points of Light is an immersive contemporary romance about the intensity of first loves, the heartache of loss, and the power of forgiveness.
Pet let nazaj je nemogoča tragedija zrušila življenje Cait London na dva dela: pred in po amneziji. Odločena, da svojo preteklost skrije in začne znova, se je preselila v Chicago in začela z novo službo - od vseh novih poznanstev, se je držala na določeni distanci.
Ne dolgo nazaj je Cait ponovno premislila o svojem obstoju, stopila skozi svoje meje, začela spremembe, se zagledala v svojega nemogočega seksi najemodajalca, Evana Wada. On je spogledljiv in nadležen, vendar ne more nehati misliti nanj, glede na to, da živita v isti stanovanjski zgradbi. Mogoče pa ga bo spravila iz svoje glave, če enkrat spi z njim. Problem je, da je Evan nedostopen za njene avanture. Ko razvijeta povezavo, postane Cait jasno, da njenemu srcu še ni uspelo občutiti kaj je ljubezen.
Ten Thousand Points of Light je poglobljena sodobna romantika o intenzivnosti prve ljubezni, o trpeči izgubi in moči odpuščanja.
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Če bi MICHELLE WARREN imela dušo živali, bi bila tiger v roza oblekici ter jezdila Harleya skozi goreči obroč. Ona živi v Chicagu, sanja o Kaliforniji, prihaja pa iz Baltimora. Malo je obsedena s potovanjem, soncem, piškoti Double Chocolate Milano in pisanjem romanov. Pisateljevo pot ni začela takoj. Desetletje se je preživljala kot profesionalna ilustratorka in oblikovalka. Svojo umetniško kreativnost je kombinirala z ljubeznijo do znanstvene fantastike, paranormalnega in fantazije, kar jo je pripeljalo do njenega prvega romana.
That's sound interesting. (Deluje zanimiva.)
With love, Knjigoljubka Maja
It’s not long before Cait reconsiders her solitary existence, and soon she’s stepping beyond her boundaries and taking unthinkable chances, like crushing on her impossibly sexy landlord, Evan Wade. He’s flirty, annoying, and with him living in the same apartment building, she can’t stop thinking about him. If she can sleep with him once, perhaps she can get him out of her system. The problem is, Evan seems bulletproof to her advances. As the two develop a connection, it becomes clear Cait may not succeed before her heart remembers what it feels like to love.
Ten Thousand Points of Light is an immersive contemporary romance about the intensity of first loves, the heartache of loss, and the power of forgiveness.
Pet let nazaj je nemogoča tragedija zrušila življenje Cait London na dva dela: pred in po amneziji. Odločena, da svojo preteklost skrije in začne znova, se je preselila v Chicago in začela z novo službo - od vseh novih poznanstev, se je držala na določeni distanci.
Ne dolgo nazaj je Cait ponovno premislila o svojem obstoju, stopila skozi svoje meje, začela spremembe, se zagledala v svojega nemogočega seksi najemodajalca, Evana Wada. On je spogledljiv in nadležen, vendar ne more nehati misliti nanj, glede na to, da živita v isti stanovanjski zgradbi. Mogoče pa ga bo spravila iz svoje glave, če enkrat spi z njim. Problem je, da je Evan nedostopen za njene avanture. Ko razvijeta povezavo, postane Cait jasno, da njenemu srcu še ni uspelo občutiti kaj je ljubezen.
Ten Thousand Points of Light je poglobljena sodobna romantika o intenzivnosti prve ljubezni, o trpeči izgubi in moči odpuščanja.
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PURCHASE LINKS (KNJIGO LAHKO KUPITE TUKAJ):
TEASERS (CITATI)
EXCERPT (ODLOMEK)
#1
In my
bathroom, a man kneels on the floor inspecting a gigantic hole of exposed pipes
with the roaming beam of a flashlight. I fold my arms and lean into the
doorframe.
When I left to meet Aggie
everything was functioning. My gaze examines the small room, picking out
details: my expensive towels soak up a deluge of water pooling on the tiled
floor, there’s a large pile of powdery, crumbled drywall, and then there’s the
issue of ass crack—in my face. It is
toned and tight, but still, it’s connected to my landlord, Evan Wade.
“Pipes burst, leaking a damn
waterfall into 5A,” he says, not bothering to glance my direction.
“Did you have to use my good
towels?” I purse my lips.
“I thought about using your sexy
lingerie.” He eyes the laundry basket of delicates now sitting on top of
the sink. “But the fancy towels seemed like a better option.”
“Thanks, appreciate it.” I sidestep him, snatch the basket, and
carry it to my bedroom, hiding it in my closet. If he had scrutinized it
closer, which he probably did, he would have found an embarrassing amount of
granny panties and more sports bras than a Lululemon.
“How long before it’s fixed?” How long before I can get rid of you?
“A week,” his muffled voice
answers.
“What?” I race back only to find
his sharky grin. Two vertical dimples slice beneath a permanent, mocha-colored
five o’clock shadow. They punctuate his bronzy sun-kissed skin, making his
caramel eyes gleam with amused delight. My gaze intensifies.
“Just kidding. And you forgot
this one.” Evan tosses me a ball of fabric. I catch it and glance at it. My
mouth drops open. A smiling kitten stares back from the crotch of a pair of
panties. Pussy panties. My cheek
temperature flickers between sweaty hot and icy cold.
“Meow.” He chuckles.
I shove Aggie’s gag gift into
the pocket of my running pants. “Funny.” I deadpan to appear unaffected.
Still, Evan seems thrilled for
tormenting me. It’s something he’s excelled at since the day we met. It may be
I’m still tipsy from drinking, but at recalling his history of irritating
jokes, I pause. I cock my head and stare at him in confusion when a doubtful
revelation hits me. Is this what Aggie was talking about? Is Evan flirting with
me? Has he been flirting all this time?
I shake my head. Impossible.
“It’s too late to get the parts
I need. So tomorrow.” He wipes his dirty hands on one of my towels, leaving a
dark streak. I bite the inside of my cheek to stop from scolding him.
“That’s not going to work. I
have an appointment first thing in the morning and I need a shower.” I gesture
to my sweaty T-shirt.
“No kidding, Cat, I can smell you from here.”
“It’s Cait, you ass.” I kick off
my loose sneaker, tossing it with my toe in his direction. I aim to nail him in
the head but he dodges away. The shoe ricochets off the wall, tumbling to the
floor.
His grin widens. “I’m kidding,
Miss London. You smell like roses, as always.”
“Seriously, what am I going to
do?”
“Can’t you use Gusterson’s
shower?” He quirks a surly lip because he already knows the answer—no. Mr.
Gusterson lives across the hall, but I’ve never seen the man. I’m unsure anyone
has.
For this comment, I kick my other
shoe in his direction.
“Ow!” This one smacks his
sizable bicep, protecting his handsome face. I suppress a triumphant smile.
Evan crouches and stands in one
fluid motion of sinewy muscle. He meets my gaze, and then rakes a hand through
his tousled chestnut-colored hair. “Fine. You don’t have to beg, Kitty Cat, you
can use mine.” He puffs his chest and flashes his brilliant white grin.
Definitely flirting. Though I shouldn’t be surprised. How many
times in the last year had I seen him at Mr. Moon’s Coffee House, sitting at a
table and flirting with some girl? There
were too many times and too many girls to count.
Evan takes his time sliding
past, I think, purposely brushing the heat of his body near me. I pin myself
against the wall, unwilling to allow our skin to touch. When will he grasp how
annoying I find him?
“I’ll pass.” I latch my hands on
my hips. This is me sending a clear message. I’m not flirting.
“Suit yourself.” Unswayed, he
lumbers for the door.
“What about these tools?” I
gesture to his mess.
“I’ll be back tomorrow.” He
turns, arms wide, palms skyward and strolls backward with a confident teeter.
He’s hitting me with his smile again and those damn dimples, like they’ll make
this situation better.
My teeth clench. If I
had something else to throw at him I would. When he disappears, I remove my
cell from my pocket and text Aggie. Before I do, I glance at my front door,
which he left wide open. His footfalls descend the stairs to his apartment on
the first floor.
#2
CHAPTER 1
Aggie’s
everything I’m not. Short. Blonde. Adorkable. Outgoing. She knows who she is in
every fiber of her being. Whereas I’m a tall brunette with a serious case of
high-functioning depression. And let’s not forget the identity issues. But I
remind myself retrograde amnesia will do that to a girl. This, at least, is one
thing I’m sure of.
Tonight we’re drinking. A lot.
I’d like to say it’s not a
normal thing, but that would be a lie. At least this time there’s a reason—a
breakup. Hers, not mine. I try to care, but I despise the guy. When I consider
her ex-boyfriend Brad’s weasel face and condescending personality, my lips draw
tight at the corners.
Still, I’m doing what I sense is
my part, being a good friend and helping her forget “that bastard.” He is one,
no doubt about it. But I’m not drinking to forget their existence as a couple.
I drink to do things I wouldn’t normally. Like hanging out in a park after
hours when there’s clearly a sign stating this section closes at dark, or
worse, sitting on the hood of a car that doesn’t belong to either of us.
Nothing too crazy. But under normal conditions, breaking these little rules
would make me nervous, give me anxiety, and make my shoulder twitch, twitch, twitch.
And then there’s my highly
irrational sense of hope. No matter how small, its dangerous whispers suggest
alcohol might have a revealing effect, releasing my lost memories from a black
hole of intoxication.
Aggie doesn’t know about my
past. No one in Chicago does, which is how I’d like to keep things. Five years
ago I woke up in a hospital, scared and near death. When I opened my eyes that
terrible day, a line was drawn. The violent slash divided my life into two
parts.
Before.
--------------------------
After.
Everything in the before was severed. The life I had was
erased, leaving a nearly blank slate. I was a twenty-one-year-old newborn
starting over in the after. But it’s
been a long time since before, and
I’m ready to move on. I think.
I blame Aggie. After knowing
her, she’s changed something in me. I long to be like her. Worry free. Anxiety
free. Just... free. She pinwheels through life with her arms spread wide and
chin lifted skyward. Even after suffering a breakup she exudes happiness. She
can’t help it. She’s unrelenting luminous sunshine, and I’m just rain. Dark,
cold, pelting rain. That’s how I know she’ll be okay. Me? I’m not so sure.
Tonight we’re at North Avenue
Beach at my favorite spot. From this vantage point across a wide cove, we view
the spectacular, long-reaching Chicago skyline. Window lights shimmer and
sparkle, reflecting on the waters of Lake Michigan.
Aggie trekked here from her
condo in Lincoln Park after another disastrous texting marathon with Brad. I
supplied the two bottles of champagne we’re inhaling, but only after Aggie decided
her breakup was cause for celebration, rather than the pout festival she hosted
the prior seven days. If it were anyone else, I think there would have been
some crying involved, but I’m honestly unsure if the word crying exists in her vocabulary.
“I need Mr. Right Now.” Aggie takes a deep chug from the
champagne bottle, winces, and hands it to me.
“Maybe
you only need you for now.” I take a
swig and finish it off with a shiver. I balance the empty bottle on the roof of
the car.
“Gross, no. I get bored with
me.” She flinches. “I need to find a new someone to forget the old someone.
It’s better to line them up, one right after another.”
She hoists her petite frame onto
the car’s hood. She lies down with her back angled against the windshield,
hands settled in her lap. I do the same, gaze pointing skyward, searching for
one twinkling star to wish upon. But this is an impossible task with all the
light pollution from the city. Not that it matters. All my wishes after seem impossible. My arms settle
heavy at my sides.
“That’s crazy talk. You only
need you,” I say.
“You’re so right. I need to get
out and sow my wild womanly oats.” Her arms flail. It doesn’t take much to
animate her melodrama. And when she drinks, her cute Southern twang emerges.
But the crazy? That’s twenty-four seven.
“That’s not what I said. Not at
all. Pay attention.” The sound of my own laughter surprises me. She makes me
smile, though she’s never given me much choice in the matter.
“I didn’t know women had oats to
sow,” I confess.
“Of course we do. I need to
explore more. Bypass all the relationship bullshit for the main event, you
know?” She winds herself up and kicks the air with her foot before sliding off
the car’s hood to the ground. “And you should too.”
“Not likely.” It’s been a long
time since I had a relationship. Before.
Back in high school or so I’ve been told. I twist the hem of my shirt.
“You can, Cait!” Aggie continues
ranting about her new plan. “We’ll both do it. We’ll march right up to hot guys
and tell them we want them. We’ll write a blog about our adventures, start a
YouTube channel, host our own talk show and get famous. The usual stuff.”
“Isn’t there already an app for
that?”
Aggie’s incoherent declaration
continues without answering. “We’ve been programmed to fit into this stupid
virginal-Suzy-Homemaker mold where guys sleep around and people call them
studs, but when girls do it they’re called sluts. It’s an epidemic. No, it’s
bigger. It’s an international crisis of double fucking standards.”
She does a cheerleading jump,
arms and legs spread wide. Her blonde hair bounces and hangs midair before she
surprisingly nails a solid landing. She gracelessly hikes her leggings around
her waist.
“It’s an intergalactic
injustice.” I punch my fist into the air to egg her on.
“Don’t be ridiculous. The point
I’m trying to make is there’s nothing wrong with sampling the goods. I could
say we should explore our sexuality or some politically correct bullshit, but
what I’m saying is we need to have fun.”
She giggle-snorts with a drunk
sway, stumbling to the car’s hood. The car catches her fall, and her waves
spill over her jean jacket dotted with artsy enamel pins. With a squeak she
lifts herself, joining me again. The weight of the alcohol makes her slump heavy
at my side. She’s winding down. Even the
sun needs to sleep.
She continues, her words
slowing. “With your job at the agency, you meet a ton of hot, eligible men.
I’ve seen you parade them around the office. They can’t help but flirt with
you.”
“They can’t?” I can’t recall any
man ever flirting with me.
“Don’t act like you don’t know.
And if you don’t, start paying attention.” She pokes my arm as if to drive in
the demand. “The point is, why not have a little naughty time with them in
those empty properties you’re trying to lease?”
“Because I could lose my broker
license.”
“It would be consensual sex.”
“In a client’s property.”
“Making it even hottterr,” she
slurs. Even though I helped her land a job as our new office assistant, she’s
been quick to make her own rules.
In my recollection I hadn’t
noticed a guy in, well, ever. Not in that way. Not after. Since I arrived I’d been slammed at my job and recently
preparing to land an important client. There’s been no time for a guy in any
capacity, not that I would want one.
“How do you get over a guy so
fast?” I ask.
“Sometimes I don’t think you
know anything. How did you make is this far in life, looking like you do, and
have no experience with guys?” She gives me a suspicious glare.
I give her my standard answer,
the one I always use when I can’t make sense of social dating conventions. Ones
I probably understood before. “I
don’t know. Late bloomer?”
Aggie’s face scrunches like
she’s unconvinced, but always unwilling to leave me unschooled on important
issues such as these, she continues with her fast-talk. “There are basic rules
to the romance universe every woman should know. Brad and I dated for three
months. The acceptable equation for getting over a breakup is two days for
every month we were together. I should have been over him by day six and it’s
already day eight. So see, I’m behind schedule and wasting precious flirting
time.”
“Makes sense. I think.” I pause
and my thoughts find their way back to where this conversation started. “Aggs,
there’s someone amazing out there for you, but in the meantime, maybe you
should enjoy time by yourself?”
This seems like the reasonable
game plan. The safe plan. That’s my plan.
“What’s that app called again?”
She slides her finger across a list of icons on her phone. “You should download
it too.”
“I’ll think about it,” I say,
hoping she’ll drop the subject.
Seconds pass before Aggie’s arms
loosen in her lap with her fingers easing off her phone. Her heavy breathing
simmers into a purring snore. With her losing consciousness, I rest my head
against hers and exhale.
What would it be like to let
loose and be different—be like Aggie? I may not want to be serious with someone
but why not take Aggie’s suggestion? Bypass the crap and have a little fun. My
lip quirks, and I soften at the hazy thought. Under the influence the word fun sounds nice.
“Hey! Get off my car!” The
command pierces the silence. Now alert, I whip my head to the voice and spot a
chubby man charging in our direction. I suck in a sharp breath and jab Aggie
with my elbow.
“What?” She jolts awake with a
grunt and looks around with an annoyed expression. She rubs her eyes and yawns.
She’s moving at sloth-speed, so
I hook my arm with hers and drag her from the car’s hood. When my feet hit the
ground, Aggie stumbles at my side. Every distasteful name she growls fades into
the background when the approaching man steps under a streetlamp and a beam of
light catches the gleam of his police badge. Pure fear shoots through my veins
as the terrifying thought of breaking the law sobers me.
“Run!” Aggie yells, finally
comprehending my urgency.
My heart beats rapid-fire as I
fall into step, sprinting behind her. Mr. Police follows in pursuit, but when I
glance back a few minutes into our chase, the poor guy’s doubled over with his
hands leveraged on his knees, heaving. Aggie spots the same and pumps her arms
and yowls with a victorious whoop.
She seeks my hand for a high five but misses and smacks my face instead. I
blanch at the pain and rub my burning cheek. Clumsiness ignites her raucous
laughter. Nervousness releases mine. Like bumbling idiots, we weave beneath
Lincoln Park’s canopy of green trees.
Outside Aggie’s condo building
with the late summer air hugging us, I thank her for cheering me up. I’m relieved
and exhilarated by our escape.
“I thought I was the one who
needed cheering,” she says.
“You know your down in the dumps
is equivalent to my happy.”
“Aww, my poor Princess of
Darkness. Try to put on a happy face.” She pats my arm. “You sure you don’t
want to stay?”
“Nah, running will help burn off
the alcohol.”
“Or make you throw up.” She
makes a barfing gesture.
“You’re such a child.” I wave
her off with a conspiratorial grin. When she vanishes into her building, I jog
into the darkness of the tree-lined street.
My apartment sits a mile south
near the city center. It’s a restored six-story brick walk-up in River North.
When I reach the top floor out of breath, I stop at the landing and zero in on
my apartment door. It’s cracked open.
My entire body stands alert, and
I glance around to confirm I’m alone. I didn’t leave it open. In fact, I
remember locking it before I left. At least I think I did. I rub my head. With
champagne bubbles floating through my mind, my recollection’s blurry.
Holding my breath, I step
forward with caution. Standing two feet away from the door, I press one finger
to the wood, easing it wider. It whines, and I freeze at the sound, half
expecting someone to jump me. When nothing happens, I continue my visual
inspection of the living room. The room is tidy. Quiet. Nothing seems out of
place. My purse sits untouched on the coffee table. I exhale and inch one step
closer.
“Hello?” My voice shakes. I’m
poised to run back down the stairs if need be. When there’s no response, I become
bold and say it louder, “Hello?”
Silence.
I step over the threshold, and
the floorboards creak beneath my weight. My gaze swings from the kitchen to the
living area and down the hall to my darkened bedroom. On tiptoes, I step
farther inside.
A loud clanking noise causes me
to jerk back with a startled heart. My shoulder hits the wall before I stumble
backward through the door and into the hall with a tight scream lodged in my
throat.
“Back here!” someone yells. I
place my hand over my hammering heart when I recognize the husky voice. I
immediately want to kill that voice.
I roll my eyes and exhale to calm my useless alarm. After gathering my wits, I
follow the continued ruckus.
In my bathroom, a man kneels on
the floor inspecting a gigantic hole of exposed pipes with the roaming beam of
a flashlight. I fold my arms and lean into the doorframe.
When I left to meet Aggie
everything was functioning. My gaze examines the small room, picking out
details: my expensive towels soak up a deluge of water pooling on the tiled
floor, there’s a large pile of powdery, crumbled drywall, and then there’s the
issue of ass crack—in my face. It is
toned and tight, but still, it’s connected to my landlord, Evan Wade.
“Pipes burst, leaking a damn
waterfall into 5A,” he says, not bothering to glance my direction.
“Did you have to use my good
towels?” I purse my lips.
“I thought about using your sexy
lingerie.” He eyes the laundry basket of delicates now sitting on top of
the sink. “But the fancy towels seemed like a better option.”
“Thanks, appreciate it.” I sidestep him, snatch the basket, and
carry it to my bedroom, hiding it in my closet. If he had scrutinized it
closer, which he probably did, he would have found an embarrassing amount of
granny panties and more sports bras than a Lululemon.
“How long before it’s fixed?” How long before I can get rid of you?
“A week,” his muffled voice
answers.
“What?” I race back only to find
his sharky grin. Two vertical dimples slice beneath a permanent, mocha-colored
five o’clock shadow. They punctuate his bronzy sun-kissed skin, making his
caramel eyes gleam with amused delight. My gaze intensifies.
“Just kidding. And you forgot
this one.” Evan tosses me a ball of fabric. I catch it and glance at it. My
mouth drops open. A smiling kitten stares back from the crotch of a pair of
panties. Pussy panties. My cheek
temperature flickers between sweaty hot and icy cold.
“Meow.” He chuckles.
I shove Aggie’s gag gift into
the pocket of my running pants. “Funny.” I deadpan to appear unaffected.
Still, Evan seems thrilled for
tormenting me. It’s something he’s excelled at since the day we met. It may be
I’m still tipsy from drinking, but at recalling his history of irritating
jokes, I pause. I cock my head and stare at him in confusion when a doubtful
revelation hits me. Is this what Aggie was talking about? Is Evan flirting with
me? Has he been flirting all this time?
I shake my head. Impossible.
“It’s too late to get the parts
I need. So tomorrow.” He wipes his dirty hands on one of my towels, leaving a
dark streak. I bite the inside of my cheek to stop from scolding him.
“That’s not going to work. I
have an appointment first thing in the morning and I need a shower.” I gesture
to my sweaty T-shirt.
“No kidding, Cat, I can smell you from here.”
“It’s Cait, you ass.” I kick off
my loose sneaker, tossing it with my toe in his direction. I aim to nail him in
the head but he dodges away. The shoe ricochets off the wall, tumbling to the
floor.
His grin widens. “I’m kidding,
Miss London. You smell like roses, as always.”
“Seriously, what am I going to
do?”
“Can’t you use Gusterson’s
shower?” He quirks a surly lip because he already knows the answer—no. Mr.
Gusterson lives across the hall, but I’ve never seen the man. I’m unsure anyone
has.
For this comment, I kick my
other shoe in his direction.
“Ow!” This one smacks his
sizable bicep, protecting his handsome face. I suppress a triumphant smile.
Evan crouches and stands in one
fluid motion of sinewy muscle. He meets my gaze, and then rakes a hand through
his tousled chestnut-colored hair. “Fine. You don’t have to beg, Kitty Cat, you
can use mine.” He puffs his chest and flashes his brilliant white grin.
Definitely flirting. Though I shouldn’t be surprised. How many
times in the last year had I seen him at Mr. Moon’s Coffee House, sitting at a
table and flirting with some girl? There
were too many times and too many girls to count.
Evan takes his time sliding
past, I think, purposely brushing the heat of his body near me. I pin myself
against the wall, unwilling to allow our skin to touch. When will he grasp how
annoying I find him?
“I’ll pass.” I latch my hands on
my hips. This is me sending a clear message. I’m not flirting.
“Suit yourself.” Unswayed, he
lumbers for the door.
“What about these tools?” I
gesture to his mess.
“I’ll be back tomorrow.” He
turns, arms wide, palms skyward and strolls backward with a confident teeter.
He’s hitting me with his smile again and those damn dimples, like they’ll make
this situation better.
My teeth clench. If I had
something else to throw at him I would. When he disappears, I remove my cell
from my pocket and text Aggie.
ME: Coming back.
AGGS: Did u barf? I knew u
would.
ME: No, but I want 2.
Thinking of Evan, I glance at my front door, which he left wide open. His
footfalls descend the stairs to his apartment on the first floor.
#1
In my
bathroom, a man kneels on the floor inspecting a gigantic hole of exposed pipes
with the roaming beam of a flashlight. I fold my arms and lean into the
doorframe.
When I left to meet Aggie
everything was functioning. My gaze examines the small room, picking out
details: my expensive towels soak up a deluge of water pooling on the tiled
floor, there’s a large pile of powdery, crumbled drywall, and then there’s the
issue of ass crack—in my face. It is
toned and tight, but still, it’s connected to my landlord, Evan Wade.
“Pipes burst, leaking a damn
waterfall into 5A,” he says, not bothering to glance my direction.
“Did you have to use my good
towels?” I purse my lips.
“I thought about using your sexy
lingerie.” He eyes the laundry basket of delicates now sitting on top of
the sink. “But the fancy towels seemed like a better option.”
“Thanks, appreciate it.” I sidestep him, snatch the basket, and
carry it to my bedroom, hiding it in my closet. If he had scrutinized it
closer, which he probably did, he would have found an embarrassing amount of
granny panties and more sports bras than a Lululemon.
“How long before it’s fixed?” How long before I can get rid of you?
“A week,” his muffled voice
answers.
“What?” I race back only to find
his sharky grin. Two vertical dimples slice beneath a permanent, mocha-colored
five o’clock shadow. They punctuate his bronzy sun-kissed skin, making his
caramel eyes gleam with amused delight. My gaze intensifies.
“Just kidding. And you forgot
this one.” Evan tosses me a ball of fabric. I catch it and glance at it. My
mouth drops open. A smiling kitten stares back from the crotch of a pair of
panties. Pussy panties. My cheek
temperature flickers between sweaty hot and icy cold.
“Meow.” He chuckles.
I shove Aggie’s gag gift into
the pocket of my running pants. “Funny.” I deadpan to appear unaffected.
Still, Evan seems thrilled for
tormenting me. It’s something he’s excelled at since the day we met. It may be
I’m still tipsy from drinking, but at recalling his history of irritating
jokes, I pause. I cock my head and stare at him in confusion when a doubtful
revelation hits me. Is this what Aggie was talking about? Is Evan flirting with
me? Has he been flirting all this time?
I shake my head. Impossible.
“It’s too late to get the parts
I need. So tomorrow.” He wipes his dirty hands on one of my towels, leaving a
dark streak. I bite the inside of my cheek to stop from scolding him.
“That’s not going to work. I
have an appointment first thing in the morning and I need a shower.” I gesture
to my sweaty T-shirt.
“No kidding, Cat, I can smell you from here.”
“It’s Cait, you ass.” I kick off
my loose sneaker, tossing it with my toe in his direction. I aim to nail him in
the head but he dodges away. The shoe ricochets off the wall, tumbling to the
floor.
His grin widens. “I’m kidding,
Miss London. You smell like roses, as always.”
“Seriously, what am I going to
do?”
“Can’t you use Gusterson’s
shower?” He quirks a surly lip because he already knows the answer—no. Mr.
Gusterson lives across the hall, but I’ve never seen the man. I’m unsure anyone
has.
For this comment, I kick my other
shoe in his direction.
“Ow!” This one smacks his
sizable bicep, protecting his handsome face. I suppress a triumphant smile.
Evan crouches and stands in one
fluid motion of sinewy muscle. He meets my gaze, and then rakes a hand through
his tousled chestnut-colored hair. “Fine. You don’t have to beg, Kitty Cat, you
can use mine.” He puffs his chest and flashes his brilliant white grin.
Definitely flirting. Though I shouldn’t be surprised. How many
times in the last year had I seen him at Mr. Moon’s Coffee House, sitting at a
table and flirting with some girl? There
were too many times and too many girls to count.
Evan takes his time sliding
past, I think, purposely brushing the heat of his body near me. I pin myself
against the wall, unwilling to allow our skin to touch. When will he grasp how
annoying I find him?
“I’ll pass.” I latch my hands on
my hips. This is me sending a clear message. I’m not flirting.
“Suit yourself.” Unswayed, he
lumbers for the door.
“What about these tools?” I
gesture to his mess.
“I’ll be back tomorrow.” He
turns, arms wide, palms skyward and strolls backward with a confident teeter.
He’s hitting me with his smile again and those damn dimples, like they’ll make
this situation better.
My teeth clench. If I
had something else to throw at him I would. When he disappears, I remove my
cell from my pocket and text Aggie. Before I do, I glance at my front door,
which he left wide open. His footfalls descend the stairs to his apartment on
the first floor.
#2
CHAPTER 1
Aggie’s
everything I’m not. Short. Blonde. Adorkable. Outgoing. She knows who she is in
every fiber of her being. Whereas I’m a tall brunette with a serious case of
high-functioning depression. And let’s not forget the identity issues. But I
remind myself retrograde amnesia will do that to a girl. This, at least, is one
thing I’m sure of.
Tonight we’re drinking. A lot.
I’d like to say it’s not a
normal thing, but that would be a lie. At least this time there’s a reason—a
breakup. Hers, not mine. I try to care, but I despise the guy. When I consider
her ex-boyfriend Brad’s weasel face and condescending personality, my lips draw
tight at the corners.
Still, I’m doing what I sense is
my part, being a good friend and helping her forget “that bastard.” He is one,
no doubt about it. But I’m not drinking to forget their existence as a couple.
I drink to do things I wouldn’t normally. Like hanging out in a park after
hours when there’s clearly a sign stating this section closes at dark, or
worse, sitting on the hood of a car that doesn’t belong to either of us.
Nothing too crazy. But under normal conditions, breaking these little rules
would make me nervous, give me anxiety, and make my shoulder twitch, twitch, twitch.
And then there’s my highly
irrational sense of hope. No matter how small, its dangerous whispers suggest
alcohol might have a revealing effect, releasing my lost memories from a black
hole of intoxication.
Aggie doesn’t know about my
past. No one in Chicago does, which is how I’d like to keep things. Five years
ago I woke up in a hospital, scared and near death. When I opened my eyes that
terrible day, a line was drawn. The violent slash divided my life into two
parts.
Before.
--------------------------
After.
Everything in the before was severed. The life I had was
erased, leaving a nearly blank slate. I was a twenty-one-year-old newborn
starting over in the after. But it’s
been a long time since before, and
I’m ready to move on. I think.
I blame Aggie. After knowing
her, she’s changed something in me. I long to be like her. Worry free. Anxiety
free. Just... free. She pinwheels through life with her arms spread wide and
chin lifted skyward. Even after suffering a breakup she exudes happiness. She
can’t help it. She’s unrelenting luminous sunshine, and I’m just rain. Dark,
cold, pelting rain. That’s how I know she’ll be okay. Me? I’m not so sure.
Tonight we’re at North Avenue
Beach at my favorite spot. From this vantage point across a wide cove, we view
the spectacular, long-reaching Chicago skyline. Window lights shimmer and
sparkle, reflecting on the waters of Lake Michigan.
Aggie trekked here from her
condo in Lincoln Park after another disastrous texting marathon with Brad. I
supplied the two bottles of champagne we’re inhaling, but only after Aggie decided
her breakup was cause for celebration, rather than the pout festival she hosted
the prior seven days. If it were anyone else, I think there would have been
some crying involved, but I’m honestly unsure if the word crying exists in her vocabulary.
“I need Mr. Right Now.” Aggie takes a deep chug from the
champagne bottle, winces, and hands it to me.
“Maybe
you only need you for now.” I take a
swig and finish it off with a shiver. I balance the empty bottle on the roof of
the car.
“Gross, no. I get bored with
me.” She flinches. “I need to find a new someone to forget the old someone.
It’s better to line them up, one right after another.”
She hoists her petite frame onto
the car’s hood. She lies down with her back angled against the windshield,
hands settled in her lap. I do the same, gaze pointing skyward, searching for
one twinkling star to wish upon. But this is an impossible task with all the
light pollution from the city. Not that it matters. All my wishes after seem impossible. My arms settle
heavy at my sides.
“That’s crazy talk. You only
need you,” I say.
“You’re so right. I need to get
out and sow my wild womanly oats.” Her arms flail. It doesn’t take much to
animate her melodrama. And when she drinks, her cute Southern twang emerges.
But the crazy? That’s twenty-four seven.
“That’s not what I said. Not at
all. Pay attention.” The sound of my own laughter surprises me. She makes me
smile, though she’s never given me much choice in the matter.
“I didn’t know women had oats to
sow,” I confess.
“Of course we do. I need to
explore more. Bypass all the relationship bullshit for the main event, you
know?” She winds herself up and kicks the air with her foot before sliding off
the car’s hood to the ground. “And you should too.”
“Not likely.” It’s been a long
time since I had a relationship. Before.
Back in high school or so I’ve been told. I twist the hem of my shirt.
“You can, Cait!” Aggie continues
ranting about her new plan. “We’ll both do it. We’ll march right up to hot guys
and tell them we want them. We’ll write a blog about our adventures, start a
YouTube channel, host our own talk show and get famous. The usual stuff.”
“Isn’t there already an app for
that?”
Aggie’s incoherent declaration
continues without answering. “We’ve been programmed to fit into this stupid
virginal-Suzy-Homemaker mold where guys sleep around and people call them
studs, but when girls do it they’re called sluts. It’s an epidemic. No, it’s
bigger. It’s an international crisis of double fucking standards.”
She does a cheerleading jump,
arms and legs spread wide. Her blonde hair bounces and hangs midair before she
surprisingly nails a solid landing. She gracelessly hikes her leggings around
her waist.
“It’s an intergalactic
injustice.” I punch my fist into the air to egg her on.
“Don’t be ridiculous. The point
I’m trying to make is there’s nothing wrong with sampling the goods. I could
say we should explore our sexuality or some politically correct bullshit, but
what I’m saying is we need to have fun.”
She giggle-snorts with a drunk
sway, stumbling to the car’s hood. The car catches her fall, and her waves
spill over her jean jacket dotted with artsy enamel pins. With a squeak she
lifts herself, joining me again. The weight of the alcohol makes her slump heavy
at my side. She’s winding down. Even the
sun needs to sleep.
She continues, her words
slowing. “With your job at the agency, you meet a ton of hot, eligible men.
I’ve seen you parade them around the office. They can’t help but flirt with
you.”
“They can’t?” I can’t recall any
man ever flirting with me.
“Don’t act like you don’t know.
And if you don’t, start paying attention.” She pokes my arm as if to drive in
the demand. “The point is, why not have a little naughty time with them in
those empty properties you’re trying to lease?”
“Because I could lose my broker
license.”
“It would be consensual sex.”
“In a client’s property.”
“Making it even hottterr,” she
slurs. Even though I helped her land a job as our new office assistant, she’s
been quick to make her own rules.
In my recollection I hadn’t
noticed a guy in, well, ever. Not in that way. Not after. Since I arrived I’d been slammed at my job and recently
preparing to land an important client. There’s been no time for a guy in any
capacity, not that I would want one.
“How do you get over a guy so
fast?” I ask.
“Sometimes I don’t think you
know anything. How did you make is this far in life, looking like you do, and
have no experience with guys?” She gives me a suspicious glare.
I give her my standard answer,
the one I always use when I can’t make sense of social dating conventions. Ones
I probably understood before. “I
don’t know. Late bloomer?”
Aggie’s face scrunches like
she’s unconvinced, but always unwilling to leave me unschooled on important
issues such as these, she continues with her fast-talk. “There are basic rules
to the romance universe every woman should know. Brad and I dated for three
months. The acceptable equation for getting over a breakup is two days for
every month we were together. I should have been over him by day six and it’s
already day eight. So see, I’m behind schedule and wasting precious flirting
time.”
“Makes sense. I think.” I pause
and my thoughts find their way back to where this conversation started. “Aggs,
there’s someone amazing out there for you, but in the meantime, maybe you
should enjoy time by yourself?”
This seems like the reasonable
game plan. The safe plan. That’s my plan.
“What’s that app called again?”
She slides her finger across a list of icons on her phone. “You should download
it too.”
“I’ll think about it,” I say,
hoping she’ll drop the subject.
Seconds pass before Aggie’s arms
loosen in her lap with her fingers easing off her phone. Her heavy breathing
simmers into a purring snore. With her losing consciousness, I rest my head
against hers and exhale.
What would it be like to let
loose and be different—be like Aggie? I may not want to be serious with someone
but why not take Aggie’s suggestion? Bypass the crap and have a little fun. My
lip quirks, and I soften at the hazy thought. Under the influence the word fun sounds nice.
“Hey! Get off my car!” The
command pierces the silence. Now alert, I whip my head to the voice and spot a
chubby man charging in our direction. I suck in a sharp breath and jab Aggie
with my elbow.
“What?” She jolts awake with a
grunt and looks around with an annoyed expression. She rubs her eyes and yawns.
She’s moving at sloth-speed, so
I hook my arm with hers and drag her from the car’s hood. When my feet hit the
ground, Aggie stumbles at my side. Every distasteful name she growls fades into
the background when the approaching man steps under a streetlamp and a beam of
light catches the gleam of his police badge. Pure fear shoots through my veins
as the terrifying thought of breaking the law sobers me.
“Run!” Aggie yells, finally
comprehending my urgency.
My heart beats rapid-fire as I
fall into step, sprinting behind her. Mr. Police follows in pursuit, but when I
glance back a few minutes into our chase, the poor guy’s doubled over with his
hands leveraged on his knees, heaving. Aggie spots the same and pumps her arms
and yowls with a victorious whoop.
She seeks my hand for a high five but misses and smacks my face instead. I
blanch at the pain and rub my burning cheek. Clumsiness ignites her raucous
laughter. Nervousness releases mine. Like bumbling idiots, we weave beneath
Lincoln Park’s canopy of green trees.
Outside Aggie’s condo building
with the late summer air hugging us, I thank her for cheering me up. I’m relieved
and exhilarated by our escape.
“I thought I was the one who
needed cheering,” she says.
“You know your down in the dumps
is equivalent to my happy.”
“Aww, my poor Princess of
Darkness. Try to put on a happy face.” She pats my arm. “You sure you don’t
want to stay?”
“Nah, running will help burn off
the alcohol.”
“Or make you throw up.” She
makes a barfing gesture.
“You’re such a child.” I wave
her off with a conspiratorial grin. When she vanishes into her building, I jog
into the darkness of the tree-lined street.
My apartment sits a mile south
near the city center. It’s a restored six-story brick walk-up in River North.
When I reach the top floor out of breath, I stop at the landing and zero in on
my apartment door. It’s cracked open.
My entire body stands alert, and
I glance around to confirm I’m alone. I didn’t leave it open. In fact, I
remember locking it before I left. At least I think I did. I rub my head. With
champagne bubbles floating through my mind, my recollection’s blurry.
Holding my breath, I step
forward with caution. Standing two feet away from the door, I press one finger
to the wood, easing it wider. It whines, and I freeze at the sound, half
expecting someone to jump me. When nothing happens, I continue my visual
inspection of the living room. The room is tidy. Quiet. Nothing seems out of
place. My purse sits untouched on the coffee table. I exhale and inch one step
closer.
“Hello?” My voice shakes. I’m
poised to run back down the stairs if need be. When there’s no response, I become
bold and say it louder, “Hello?”
Silence.
I step over the threshold, and
the floorboards creak beneath my weight. My gaze swings from the kitchen to the
living area and down the hall to my darkened bedroom. On tiptoes, I step
farther inside.
A loud clanking noise causes me
to jerk back with a startled heart. My shoulder hits the wall before I stumble
backward through the door and into the hall with a tight scream lodged in my
throat.
“Back here!” someone yells. I
place my hand over my hammering heart when I recognize the husky voice. I
immediately want to kill that voice.
I roll my eyes and exhale to calm my useless alarm. After gathering my wits, I
follow the continued ruckus.
In my bathroom, a man kneels on
the floor inspecting a gigantic hole of exposed pipes with the roaming beam of
a flashlight. I fold my arms and lean into the doorframe.
When I left to meet Aggie
everything was functioning. My gaze examines the small room, picking out
details: my expensive towels soak up a deluge of water pooling on the tiled
floor, there’s a large pile of powdery, crumbled drywall, and then there’s the
issue of ass crack—in my face. It is
toned and tight, but still, it’s connected to my landlord, Evan Wade.
“Pipes burst, leaking a damn
waterfall into 5A,” he says, not bothering to glance my direction.
“Did you have to use my good
towels?” I purse my lips.
“I thought about using your sexy
lingerie.” He eyes the laundry basket of delicates now sitting on top of
the sink. “But the fancy towels seemed like a better option.”
“Thanks, appreciate it.” I sidestep him, snatch the basket, and
carry it to my bedroom, hiding it in my closet. If he had scrutinized it
closer, which he probably did, he would have found an embarrassing amount of
granny panties and more sports bras than a Lululemon.
“How long before it’s fixed?” How long before I can get rid of you?
“A week,” his muffled voice
answers.
“What?” I race back only to find
his sharky grin. Two vertical dimples slice beneath a permanent, mocha-colored
five o’clock shadow. They punctuate his bronzy sun-kissed skin, making his
caramel eyes gleam with amused delight. My gaze intensifies.
“Just kidding. And you forgot
this one.” Evan tosses me a ball of fabric. I catch it and glance at it. My
mouth drops open. A smiling kitten stares back from the crotch of a pair of
panties. Pussy panties. My cheek
temperature flickers between sweaty hot and icy cold.
“Meow.” He chuckles.
I shove Aggie’s gag gift into
the pocket of my running pants. “Funny.” I deadpan to appear unaffected.
Still, Evan seems thrilled for
tormenting me. It’s something he’s excelled at since the day we met. It may be
I’m still tipsy from drinking, but at recalling his history of irritating
jokes, I pause. I cock my head and stare at him in confusion when a doubtful
revelation hits me. Is this what Aggie was talking about? Is Evan flirting with
me? Has he been flirting all this time?
I shake my head. Impossible.
“It’s too late to get the parts
I need. So tomorrow.” He wipes his dirty hands on one of my towels, leaving a
dark streak. I bite the inside of my cheek to stop from scolding him.
“That’s not going to work. I
have an appointment first thing in the morning and I need a shower.” I gesture
to my sweaty T-shirt.
“No kidding, Cat, I can smell you from here.”
“It’s Cait, you ass.” I kick off
my loose sneaker, tossing it with my toe in his direction. I aim to nail him in
the head but he dodges away. The shoe ricochets off the wall, tumbling to the
floor.
His grin widens. “I’m kidding,
Miss London. You smell like roses, as always.”
“Seriously, what am I going to
do?”
“Can’t you use Gusterson’s
shower?” He quirks a surly lip because he already knows the answer—no. Mr.
Gusterson lives across the hall, but I’ve never seen the man. I’m unsure anyone
has.
For this comment, I kick my
other shoe in his direction.
“Ow!” This one smacks his
sizable bicep, protecting his handsome face. I suppress a triumphant smile.
Evan crouches and stands in one
fluid motion of sinewy muscle. He meets my gaze, and then rakes a hand through
his tousled chestnut-colored hair. “Fine. You don’t have to beg, Kitty Cat, you
can use mine.” He puffs his chest and flashes his brilliant white grin.
Definitely flirting. Though I shouldn’t be surprised. How many
times in the last year had I seen him at Mr. Moon’s Coffee House, sitting at a
table and flirting with some girl? There
were too many times and too many girls to count.
Evan takes his time sliding
past, I think, purposely brushing the heat of his body near me. I pin myself
against the wall, unwilling to allow our skin to touch. When will he grasp how
annoying I find him?
“I’ll pass.” I latch my hands on
my hips. This is me sending a clear message. I’m not flirting.
“Suit yourself.” Unswayed, he
lumbers for the door.
“What about these tools?” I
gesture to his mess.
“I’ll be back tomorrow.” He
turns, arms wide, palms skyward and strolls backward with a confident teeter.
He’s hitting me with his smile again and those damn dimples, like they’ll make
this situation better.
My teeth clench. If I had
something else to throw at him I would. When he disappears, I remove my cell
from my pocket and text Aggie.
ME: Coming back.
AGGS: Did u barf? I knew u
would.
ME: No, but I want 2.
AUTHOR (AVTOR)
If MICHELLE WARREN had a
spirit animal, it would be a tiger in a pink tutu, riding a Harley
through a ring of fire. She lives in Chicago, dreams of California but
hails from Baltimore. She has a slight obsession with travel, sunshine,
Double Chocolate Milano cookies and writing novels. She didn’t travel the
road to writer immediately. She spent over a decade as professional illustrator
and designer. Her artistic creativity combined with her love of science
fiction, paranormal and fantasy led her to write her first novel.
Če bi MICHELLE WARREN imela dušo živali, bi bila tiger v roza oblekici ter jezdila Harleya skozi goreči obroč. Ona živi v Chicagu, sanja o Kaliforniji, prihaja pa iz Baltimora. Malo je obsedena s potovanjem, soncem, piškoti Double Chocolate Milano in pisanjem romanov. Pisateljevo pot ni začela takoj. Desetletje se je preživljala kot profesionalna ilustratorka in oblikovalka. Svojo umetniško kreativnost je kombinirala z ljubeznijo do znanstvene fantastike, paranormalnega in fantazije, kar jo je pripeljalo do njenega prvega romana.
Connect with Michelle (Michelle lahko spremljate na njenih spletnih straneh):
That's sound interesting. (Deluje zanimiva.)
With love, Knjigoljubka Maja
Prva ljubezen - je neumna ali ne? Rekla bi, da ni neumna, temveč nora. Hvala za opis knjige.
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